Shut Up Christmas

Lisa’s new puppy has an annoying new toy. Pat and Lisa review those Christmas songs that make you want to cut your ears off, and those that make you bawl your eyes out. And, Lisa wants to go over the wall to get a colonoscopy.

shut-up-christmas

Songs in this episode:

“Jingle Bells” Unknown kid choir
“Drive My Car” The Beatles
“The Little Drummer Boy” The Harry Simone Chorale
“All I Want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth” Spike Jones and the City Slickers
“All I Want for Christmas (Is You) Mariah Carey
“Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer” Elmo and Patsy
“Brandy” Looking Glass
“Feliz Navidad” Jose Feliciano
“Carol of the Bells” Trans-Siberian Orchestra
“O Holy Night” Josh Groban
“Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” Frank Sinatra
“The Christmas Song” Nat King Cole
“Walking in a Winter Wonderland” Dean Martin
“Frosty the Snowman” Jimmy Durante
“Ave Maria” Celine Dion
“Celebrate Me Home” Kenny Loggins

Big Dog Butts

Pat finds out his dog is afflicted with something most of us humans suffer from.  And Lisa has a bad puppy experience. 2016 is barely off the ground, and the celebrity death count is already exceptionally high.  Lisa has to chose between between 2 opposite ends of her body for medical care.

fluffy dog butt

                 “Wow, I need to lay off the bread.”

 

Songs in this episode: 

“Jungle Boogie” Kool and the Gang
“I Love my Dog” Cat Stevens
“What’s Love Got to do With It?” Tina Turner
“It Keeps You Running” The Doobie Brothers
“Heart and Soul” Huey Lewis and the News
“Puppy Love” Paul Anka
“Beer Barrel Polka” Frankie Yankovic and the Yanks
“Teach Your Children” Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young
“You’re Still a Young Man” Tower of Power
“Shining Star” Earth, Wind and Fire
Theme from “Green Acres”
Excerpt from “Hello Dummy!” Don Rickles
“Garden Party” Ricky Nelson
“Candy” Johnny Mercer, Jo Stafford and the Pied Pipers with the Paul Weston Orchestra
“Slow Talkers of America” Bob and Ray

It’s Stuck In My Nose

Pat has a “cleansing party” with his wife. Lisa cuts her eyelashes and Pat clips his eyebrows. Lisa lies to her dental hygenist. If its “free”, will you jump on it like a tramp on a muffin no matter what it is?

Up my nose

“I lost my keys – do you see them up there?”

 

Songs in this episode:

“Everybody Wants to Rule the World” Tears for Fears

“Blueberry Hill” Fats Domino
“Jungle Fever” The Chakachas
“Something in the Air” Thunderclap Newman
“Fanny (Be Tender With My Love)” The Bee Gees
“Up, Up and Away” The Fifth Dimension
“Beans in my Ears” The Serendipity Singers
“It’s a Gas” Alfred E. Neuman
“Give Me Novacaine” Green Day
“The Great Pretender” The Platters
“Second Piano Concerto (The Dentist)” Mike Nichols & Elaine May
“Lookin’ Out My Back Door” Credence Clearwater Revival
“Tape Worm Song” Brian Packham
“Moose Turd Pie” Utah Phillips
Excerpt from documentary “Going Clear”
“Free” Zac Brown Band
“Free Bird” Lynyrd Skynyrd
“Rockin’ in the Free World” Neil Young
“Step Right Up” Tom Waits

 

Time For A Butt Check Up

Pat can’t let go of the disappointment of not winning Best Podcast on Best of Western Washington. And, how does one gracefully break up with one’s hair stylist? And Pat encourages Lisa to get her butt check up.

colonoscopy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“HEY! There’s corn in here!”

 

 

Songs in this episode:
“What’s Going On? Marvin Gaye
“Paperback Writer” The Beatles
“Radetsky March” Johann Strauss
“You Should be Dancing” Bee Gees
“Breaking Up is Hard to do” Neil Sedaka
“You’ve Got a Friend” James Taylor
“Piece of my Heart” Janis Joplin
“Hurt” Johnny Cash
“Hurts so Bad” Little Anthony and the Imperials
“Up Around the Bend” Credence Clearwater Revival
Twilight Zone theme
“Ain’t No Sunshine” Bill Withers
“That Smell” Lynyrd Skynyrd

The Middle Seat Sucks

Pat found a dent in his truck – should he unleash his fury on the culprit? Which begs the question: are there people in your life you would NEVER lend anything to? Also, Pat and Lisa discuss the delights of getting your body parts examined.

 

Uh, I didn't notice this when I LENT you MY TRUCK!

Uh, I didn’t notice this when I LENT you MY TRUCK!

 

 

Songs in this episode

“Strangers on the Shore” Mr. Acker Bilk
“Borrowing Time” Aimee Mann
“She’s Gone” Hall and Oates
“Stacey Brown’s Got Two” Shel Silverstein
“Up Around the Bend” Creedence Clearwater Revival
“Do You Want to Know a Secret?” The Beatles
“Cool Water” Sons of the Pioneers